So Angry That It's Ridiculous

So second one of the week, I'm gonna get straight to it. People are stupid. I don't understand it. To a certain degree I can see the reason people are the way they are but I don't completely understand why it's so hard to see the things that I see and to learn the things I've learned. I mean they seem pretty basic to me. I don't know. One of the biggest things that gets me is people's constant need to be angry or show rage and aggression. Don't get it anymore, it's like people don't even think anymore. Are there moments where people just voluntarily shut off their brains? Do people want to be stupid? In a way, maybe they do. I can honestly say that sometimes I get to the point where I don't want to feel good. It's like, "Shut up, just let me be sad (or mad)" You know?

Unfortunately both feelings are highly destructive to everyone around you. Emotions are contagious, and if you have children they're even more dangerous, because children can pick up the emotions you show, if you're an angry person most of the time then they will learn to fear you or they will learn to be aggressive as a way to get what they want. Both, down the road, will put strains on your relationship as they put strains on all relationships that have had time to mature. Sadness is one of those emotions that you can never really predict when it will show up, because things happen, the world is a sad place it's not all rainbows and butterflies. But anger is one of the things that's more than controllable, it's completely unnecessary.

Now I know, what's going on in your head now, "What about when people are annoying, or I have a bad day, or what if I'm just under a lot of stress?" None of those are good reasons to get angry. If people are annoying, then be annoyed. If you're having a bad day, do something to make it better, it's not everyone else's fault that things are effecting you negatively. If you're under a lot of stress, be stressed, it's ok. These feelings aren't bad all by themselves, it's when you start taking it out on other people or you just start having a bad attitude is when it starts to be a problem. Still not convinced that you have a problem. Anger is a word that is overly used so I'm not surprised. What most people don't understand is that anger in the true sense of the word is better described as, rage, fury, wrath, or resentment, all of which I'm 100% all of us have felt towards someone at one point or another. So don't even try to start lying to me, or more importantly yourself. I don't need to go into defining any of these because we already know how serious these are. Take a look at what Wikipedia has to say about anger.

The physical effects of anger include increased heart rate, blood pressure, and levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline. Anger becomes the predominant feeling behaviorally, cognitively, and physiologically when a person makes the conscious choice to take action to immediately stop the threatening behavior of another outside force. Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. While most of those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of "what has happened to them," psychologists point out that an angry person can be very well mistaken because anger causes a loss in self-monitoring capacity and objective observability.

Modern psychologists have labeled two types of anger: Passive and Aggressive. What you need to understand is that one is not better than the other. They both have the same destructive power. What is deceiving about anger is that the damage that we inflict occurs beneath the skin.

Passive anger can be expressed in a few ways, those being: stockpiling resentments that are expressed behind people's backs, avoiding eye contact, putting people down, gossiping, apologizing too often, being overly critical, inviting criticism, setting yourself and others up for failure, choosing unreliable people to depend on, expressing frustration at insignificant things but ignoring serious ones, giving the cold shoulder or phony smiles, looking unconcerned, sitting on the fence while others sort things out, oversleeping, and not responding to another's anger.

Aggressive anger most of us are very familiar with. This comes in the form of: threats, physical violence, verbal abuse, punishing people for unwarranted deeds, destructiveness, bullying, playing on people's weaknesses, accusing other people for your own mistakes, blaming people for your own feelings, being over-punitive, refusing to forgive and forget, bringing up hurtful memories from the past, explosive rages over minor frustrations, and illogical arguments.

Everyone has done more than half of these things to express their anger, I'm sure of it. In reading those did you realize how many of those were unnecessary and ridiculous? You can try to justify your feeling of anger towards a person, all of us have done it/are doing it. What needs to be realized in this sense is that no one else is responsible for the way that you feel, even if you should have every right to be angry. You are the one that is in control of your own emotions, no one but you makes you angry. And being angry solves nothing, it only breeds more anger. It's a continual ridiculous circle, you get angry so someone else gets angry and strikes back, so you strike back, and so on and so on. It doesn't end till one of you gets tired and gives up. Nothing has been accomplished except that you proved who can be the angriest the longest. And when you think about it, THAT IS SO STUPID. Don't be stupid!! This is why in the last post I said that you need to start thinking about yourself objectively, because a lot of us don't know that we're being ridiculous, we're to focused on everything and everybody else that we haven't had time to figure out what is important and then do some repairative work on ourselves. Figure this out, do some self examination. I'll get back to you next week, cuz we're not done with this.



Source: Unknown Author. (2010). Anger. Available: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anger. Last accessed 23 April 2010.